You Rotten So-and-So

While I am deeply grateful for the brains of the world who invented or created stuff like the telephone, ice cream, balloons and firecrackers, I am a bit let down by the fact that no one has yet come up with a machine that can help you yell some choice epithets at those crraazzzy drivers who seem to be growing in numbers on Dubai’s roads. (And no, before you think it or say it, I am not of a scientific bent of mind otherwise I would have created this machine myself).

The other day I had a wacko driver cut in front of me at a speed more suited for the race track. My guardian angel was surely looking out for me cause he managed to cut across three lanes and take a u-turn without killing me or anyone else on the road. There were about 4 drivers who could be seen yelling swear words at that moron. But what is the use? As he sped away it was also obvious that he did not care two hoots for what we had to say as he could not hear us.

Which is why the machine that I mentioned will come in real handy. The idea is to have a machine that hollers out the epithet of choice and also calls out the make of the car and it’s number. Something along the lines of “Hey you rotten so-and-so driving the dirty white, dented Nissan Sunny U12345. Next time you cut in front of another law abiding citizen without bothering to indicate, you will break into hives.”

Ooohh… what fun it would be. But until such time I will be carrying a loudspeaker in my car. You rotten so-and-so drivers out there better watch out.

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